


you will find a second soul

by doriantrash



Category: Criminal Minds
Genre: Fluff, M/M, scmoop
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-01-16
Updated: 2016-01-16
Packaged: 2018-05-14 09:10:08
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 809
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/5737882
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/doriantrash/pseuds/doriantrash
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Now Derek sees coffee and thinks about making some for Spencer and he sees a horrible romantic comedy and thinks about Spencer when the couple finally gets their shit together and kiss and then he sees purple and thinks of Spencer and then every color is about Spencer.</p>
            </blockquote>





	you will find a second soul

Derek always thought it would be hard, the hardest thing in the world, just to let it go and fall in love with someone like Spencer Reid, but apparently Derek knows absolutely nothing.

He remembers believing that falling in love would feel like actual falling and he always wondered how did relationships even work if you felt like falling from ten-story high building every time you looked at them but then Spencer came along and made him realize he was wrong about it too.

The actual act of falling in love with Spencer was nothing like Derek expected. First of all it was so easy Derek missed it happening and then one day he looked at Spencer sitting across from him in the jet and thought ‘what did I do right in my life when I got him and how do I keep on doing that forever’ and Hotch was still talking about murder victims and Rossi was looking at Derek funnily because Derek probably looked like he was about to fall from an airplane but none of it mattered because Spencer looked up and smiled at Derek and they both knew that down where his shirt’s collar covered them, were bruises that matched Derek’s mouth. In that moment Derek realized he fell in love somewhere between teasing Reid about anything and everything and holding him in the middle of the night when everything was just too much but he couldn't pinpoint the actual moment and maybe it should've scared him more but Spencer was still smiling and Derek couldn’t help but smile back at him. After that moment Derek tried to notice the moments where he felt like Spencer was his whole world but soon lost track. Nowadays he feels like it all the time. He isn't sure what to make of it.

So falling in love with Spencer was the easy part. Realizing it was harder but sometimes Derek does miss things that are right in front of him – which explains why he didn’t just grab Spencer and run when they first met and instead spent too much time pining over him – so maybe he can’t be blamed for it. The actual difficulty is trying not to yell it from the rooftops and not to tell about it to everyone they meet because Spencer is so beautiful and Derek just wants to tell everybody how lucky he is to wake up with him but somehow he copes and manages not to tell absolutely everyone how Spencer looks in his clothes in the evenings when Derek’s whole body is wrapped around him but it still doesn’t feel like they are close enough.

It should be terrifying. It should feel like the whole world had changed overnight but it doesn’t. Everything is the same but at the same time it isn’t, so Derek starts to think about his life as a story of two parts. There’s _before_ Spencer and _after_ Spencer and Derek knows he can never go back to who he was _before_ since _after_ is so much better.

So Derek was wrong about falling in love and Spencer made him realize it. Not a big surprise since Spencer changed his whole life so why not change his way of thinking at the same time. Now Derek sees coffee and thinks about making some for Spencer and he sees a horrible romantic comedy and thinks about Spencer when the couple finally gets their shit together and kiss and then he sees purple and thinks of Spencer and then every color is about Spencer. Then he realizes that home is not a place anymore; it’s holding Spencer and he wants to hold on forever.

Falling in love with Spencer Reid is now a specialty of Derek Morgan and one day he will write a book about it and call it _Softness_ or _The easiest thing in the world_ or _I gave him coffee and he took my heart what do I do now_ or _Meant to be_ and it will make Spencer laugh and nowadays Derek’s day is not finished if he hasn’t made him laugh. Apparently he is an actual professional in the art of loving Spencer and sometimes it makes him sad because everyone should master that talent because Spencer deserves all the love in the world but most of the time he is glad he is the only one who gets to see every crack in Spencer's perfection and still want to wake up next to him every morning.

Loving Spencer was never supposed to be the easiest thing in the world but somehow Derek blinked and his whole world shifted its focus to Spencer and every time he kisses him just because he wants to Spencer looks at him like Derek is the center of his universe and Derek swears he’ll never stop loving him.


End file.
